Crouching Wolf Position, 2006-2017
transforming and reshaping a person’s cognition
christa maria suffered for 16 years from the eating disorder bulimia and anorexia nervosa, which is a mental illness, not a lifestyle choice. It begins with overwhelming feelings of low self-esteem, fear, guilt, shame, loneliness, and anxiety. Interestingly, these are the same psychological symptoms of trauma, abuse, and neglect. a preoccupation with food is an attempt to numb all those feelings.
The psychological and physical consequences of bulimia ultimately alter the person’s emotional health and drive individuals to become extremely impulsive and irrational in their thoughts and behaviors.
christa maria's self-awareness, self-love, talents, empathy, and compassion have been in cold storage from the age of 13 years.
I met christa maria 2001, when she was 29 years old, and i quickly acknowledged her exceptional potential, but also her substandard education and social skills. she wanted to shift, but was certain nothing can safe her.
“Art is a wound turned into light.” ~ Georges Braque
discovering a person's essence
photographic works about a process of actualizing one’s potentialities
christa maria’s journey serves as the impulse for the photographic works. feelings and emotions are transformed into allegorical images.
baustelle. two stages used for eight photographic works about recovery
Stage I & Stage II will be used for multiple scenes, from progressing to mindfulness, self-awareness, and self-care.
The response of Body shaming, Bullying, Gender discrimination, observing violence, and sexual abuse generated uncontrollable inner feelings and self-destruction.
In order to heal, pain must simply be understood.
Baustelle, Stage I
Baustelle, stage II
one step leads to another, with pauses in between to resolve
over the years working with christa maria she shifted different aspects of her being; intellectual, physical, relational, and emotional. she learned healthy boundaries, honoring her heart, and recognizing her authentic-self. She healed and developed. eventually, she came to believe that she has value to offer. she became present in the world as a woman.
“To know thyself is the beginning of wisdom.” ~ Socrates
an art exhibition
the works is intended to appear as an art exhibition. a book of christa maria’s journey is in development.
a creative partnership with christa maria
artist and photographer klaus laubmayer
a german born photographer, installation and video artist has been based in new York city until 2004. his works encompasses theatrical installation, conceptual art, portraiture, beauty and fashion photography and includes the ny times, time magazine, vogue, stern, karl lagerfeld, christian lacroix, comme des garcons, ullstein, rizzolli, simon & schuster, among others.
klaus Laubmayer currently lives and works at his birthplace duesseldorf.
© Klaus Laubmayer
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